Breaking up has its perks – especially when there was the small matter of a six hour difference and 3,000 plus miles. On the plus side, the need to remember birthdays (I sucked majorly at this, which probably added to my being kicked to the kerb), answer phone calls at odd hours of the day and be a pillar of strength to someone finally vanishes, and one is free to pursue other interests. On the flip side, the months of getting to know someone from the ground up are then tossed away, as though all meaning were trivial. Only after a while does the real cost register – long periods that were once filled with sharing the minutiae of life are suddenly filled with solitude; solitude which has the potential to bend one’s mind and numb it into a stupor.
Any doubts I may have had that we were done died yesterday. It truly is goodbye to EJ, and that with an air of finality. In retrospect, not talking through our differences face to face when I took my trip at the beginning of the year came back to haunt me in a really big way. The major sticking point being my inability to define a coherent Worldview that is sufficiently liberal and is devoid of Evangelical underpinnings. Life goes on as they say. For me, all that is left is the arduous task of completely wiping her out of my mind, out of my memory, and out of every iota of consciousness…. Hard task, but a bloke has to keep his sanity…. 😦
Blogoratti’s shared an apt quote:
Sometimes old things need to go away. That way, we have room for the new things that come into our lives
-Randy K. Milholland
Can my new things show up already?
A few weeks ago, ‘Jane Doe’ prompted some deep thinking by Single Nigerian, leading him to ponder if trying now and then was enough when others had sacrificed things (even their lives) to ‘get the word to the common man.’
I was listening to an old message by Al Mohler – Being Men and Raising Men [mp3] – whilst walking to work today, and a section [begins at 51;11] struck me as being a very apt answer to that question.
The disconnect between labour and reward is one of the most unbiblical manifestations of the confusion of this culture. We must teach our sons that they are expected to work, and that labour is by God’s design followed by reward. And the reward is more than money and more than material; it is the satisfaction in a man’s heart of knowing he has done something to the glory of God.
There is the temptation for some men to say, “You know, I can see what he does. He gets to do great things for the glory of God, the world gets to observe him and see him in what he does, the church gets to celebrate that, but all I do is this! ”
Whatever you do, do to the glory of God……. There are no little people, there are no little places, there are no little jobs in the kingdom of God. You will never know what life you were touching by your honesty as an accountant, by your steadfastness as a police officer, by your integrity as a teacher. You will never know how the glory of God is shown until in eternity you are given a glimpse of how God worked through you.
If to be feelingly alive to the sufferings of my fellow-creatures is to be a fanatic, I am one of the most incurable fanatics ever permitted to be at large.
William Wilberforce (Abolusionist & Member of Parliament)
He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose.
Jim Elliot (Missionary to Ecuador and Martyr)
The greatest enemy of hunger for God is not poison but apple pie. It is not the banquet of the wicked that dulls our appetite for heaven, but endless nibbling at the table of the world. It is not the X-rated video, but the prime-time dribble of triviality we drink in every night. For all the ill that Satan can do, when God describes what keeps us from the banquet table of his love, it is a piece of land, a yoke of oxen, and a wife
John Piper (Pastor for Preaching Bethlehem Baptist Church)